Getting By

It amazes me, I can reach to work at 10.30am and finish everything I am supposed to do by three. I spend minimal time organising for the next day, and I am usually out.

I wanted to call in sick so bad today. It’s just terribly difficult to be in that building. It’s a stressful place and the frustrations and emotional negativity in that building accumulates.

It’s a bad jumbie that sits on the place.

I tell people that our Managing Director needs to get one Holy Man from each religious tradition being practised in Trinidad and come and bless the place from top to bottom. I am convinced someone or people died there, as well as a great many wicked and wrong things. There is no reason for the level of misery of the workers. Everybody can’t be that fucking miserable.

Lawd, lawd…. I learn everyday about all the kinds of things I want my corporation to be and not be. All the ways between working with people instead of having them work for me.

My new assistant is working out.

She works hard, and although she makes mistakes, she’s really on top of everything and she supports my position very nicely.

I like her a lot too. I think she’s a good girl. Still waiting to see how it goes.

I’m feeling much better these days. The worst of the most recent sleeplessness is passing.

Like my sister bluey, I went through a dead serious cleaning thing this weekend. I bought a new broom, new mop, and various other cleaning supplies and I cleaned my house. I also smudged the house as well.

For those who don’t know, smudging is a process of cleansing the house with smoke. I bought another bag of sage leaves and a good sized clay pot. I prayed and thanked the leaves for their role in my efforts, and tried to light them. After my first few heart breaking attempts to light the leaves, which ended in a little smoke and then nothing. I had to walk away, settle my mind and my intent and try again.

Eventually, I did get them lit, and l feel like Spirit told me blow on the leaves. I blew softly and like magic, the leaves caught and I got smoke. I smudged my bedroom on Friday night and the rest of my apartment on Saturday.

I woke up on Sunday feeling much better than I had in a long time.

It’s amazing how simple things can make you feel like you’re healing and growing again.

I’m just so glad that knowledge is all around me, and with a little intuition and divine guidance you can always find your way.

My Baba in Nigeria called me on Friday morning as well. He gave me a lot of comforting words and told me to stop worrying, my blessings were coming. He told me he was praying for me, and that I would start to feel the effects in about two weeks.

So although things aren’t anywhere near a complete kind of contentment, I feel as though I’ve rounded a particularly dangerous bend, and am settling into at least a more stable stretch.

Mama Osun is with me. Orisa is with me. God is with me. Always they are here, and I am never alone.

—–

SOME LYRICS TO CHOP LIKE ZORO

——

Get By

[Talib]

Yeah.. my Lord.. yeah

[Verse 1: Talib]

We sell, crack to our own out the back of our homes

We smell the musk at the dusk in the crack of the dawn

We go through “Epidodes II,” like “Attack of the Clones”

Work ’til we break our back and you hear the crack of the bone

To get by.. just to get by

Just to get by, just to get by

We commute to computers

Spirits stay mute while you eagles spread rumors

We survivalists, turned to consumers

To get by.. just to get by

Just to get by, just to get by

Ask Him why some people got to live in a trailer, cuss like a sailor

I paint a picture with the pen like Norman Mailer

Me and Willa raised three daughters all by herself, with no help

I think about a struggle and I find the strength in myself

These words, melt in my mouth

They hot, like the jail cell in the South

Before my nigga Core bailed me out

To get by.. just to get by

Just to get by, just to get by

We do or die like Bed-Stuy through the red sky

with the window of the red eye

Let the lead fly, some G. Rap shit, “Livin’ to Let Die”

[Chorus: Background singers]

This morning, I woke up

Feeling brand new and I jumped up

Feeling my highs, and my lows

In my soul, and my goals

Just to stop smokin, and stop drinkin

And I’ve been thinkin – I’ve got my reasons

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

[Talib and background singers]

(ba ba ba, ba da bada, ba da bada, ba da bada, ba da badahh

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

Just to get (by by by by by by)

(ba ba ba, ba da bada, ba da bada, ba da bada, ba da badahh

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

Just to get (by by by by by by)

[Verse 2: Talib]

We keeping it gangster say “fo shizzle”, “fo sheezy” and “stayin crunk”

Its easy to pull a breezy, smoke trees, and we stay drunk

Yo, I activism – attackin the system, the blacks and latins in prison

Numbers of prison they victim black in the vision

Shit and all they got is rappin to listen to

I let them know we missin you, the love is unconditional

Even when the condition is critical, when the livin is miserable

Your position is pivotal, I ain’t bullshittin you

Now, why would I lie? Just to get by?

Just to get by, we get fly

The TV got us reachin for stars

Not the ones between Venus and Mars, the ones that be readin for parts

Some people get breast enhancements and penis enlargers

Saturday sinners Sunday morning at the feet of the Father

They need somethin to rely on, we get high on all types of drug

When, all you really need is love

To get by.. just to get by

Just to get by, just to get by

Our parents sing like John Lennon, “Imagine all the people watch”

We rock like Paul McCartney from now until the last Beatle drop

[Chorus: Background singers]

This morning, I woke up

Feeling brand new and I jumped up

Feeling my high’s, and my low’s

In my soul, and my goals

Just to stop smoking, and stop drinking

And I’ve been thinking – I’ve got my reasons

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

Just to get (by), just to get (by)

[Talib: repeat 2x – with background singers]

Yoyoyo, yo

Some people cry, and some people try

Just to get by, for a piece of the pie

You love to eat and get high

We decieve when we lie, and we keepin it fly

Yoyoyo, yo

When, the people decide, to keep a disguise

Can’t see they eyes, see the evil inside

But there’s people you find

Strong or feeble in mind, I stay readin the signs

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thegoddessroom

The Vault

sungoddess

mermaid, dayo's mama, water priestess, writer, web developer, omo yemoja, dos aguas, obsessive reader, sci-fi fan, trini-bajan, combermerian, second life, music, music, music!